Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Avoid cliches Like The Plague I

I used to believe that clichés were a sign of lazy writing. What am I saying... I still believe clichés are a sign of lazy writing. But recently, I was reading a wonderful short story, nearly perfectly crafted except for one cliché that slipped into the prose. Unfortunately, it was the one cliché I hate the most, and while it jolted me out of the story, I forgave this particular writer this one time because it was such a well done story, I figure it had to be that one slip that happened to make it past the writer and the editors (although I don't know how). So with that being said, here's a few clichés that just drive me insane...
  • "head over heels" - yep, this was the one that slipped through into the story I was reading. Unless you are lying down or hanging upside down, you are always head over heels. I bet you're head over heels at this very moment. In fact, if you fall, then you want to fall head over heels, because that means you haven't fallen at all.
  • "heart of hearts" - what the hell does that even mean? Seriously? Does the heart have a heart? Is one particular heart the personification of all hearts. I have no idea. But people who use that phrase should be kicked in the butt of butts.
  • "all of a sudden there was a gunshot/explosion/etc" - do I really have to explain this one? or can I simply say that if you're able to give me an example of a gunshot or explosion that is not sudden, then I will retract this statement.
  • "disappeared into thin air" -- so in other words, whatever disappeared, it happened at a high attitude, because the air is thick at sea level. Or maybe whatever it was, it wouldn't have disappeared if the air had been thinner.
So I give you those four for now. I know I will follow up with more at some later date because I hate clichés and could go on for hours about them. Until then unless you are a doctor, nurse, or missionary in some third-world country, you should avoid the above clichés, like....well.... avoid them like the plague.

Until Next Time...
Lazily Yours,

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